Welcome to 2012 England!

When I first moved to London 9 months ago it’s safe to say I noticed many differences about the UK from the US. French Fries are now chips and thank you is now cheers, these are the sort of things I can use to. However there is one gleaming difference I have seen that is utterly mind blowing and makes me question if I took a time machine back to the 1800’s in some parallel universe. Once upon a time in 1823 a wonder little product was invented. Toady it is still used and loved, this product is the window screen. This wonderful little mesh woven metal object is placed between the outside world and an open window. But why you ask? Because they help keep bugs and insect as well as other creatures outside where they belong.

The other day a friend told me they had a pigeon fly into their house one time. Oh well isn’t that just fine and dandy! Let me catch you up on a little secret here buddy boy, and maybe you should take a seat for this one because it may rock your world. IF YOU HAD A FREAKING SCREEN IN THE WINDOW THESE THINGS COULDN’T HAPPEN!

SO why the hell do they not have them in the UK?!?!?! Am I missing something here? Is there a reason they are living with 1900’s windows when we are now in the 21st century? I mean honestly folks, it is mind f***ing! How do you live in a world with television, Ipads, and computers but not a simple little window screen? Seriously, these things come in all shapes and sizes and their reasonably priced. So someone somewhere explain to me please, what is the hold up? And don’t even think about giving me that BS line about how all the buildings are old and need to keep the historic charm. You can only see a screen when your actually physically in the room, therefore that excuse means nothing to me.

I’ll tell you what England, let me do you a solid. I am going to start a charity in your honor and have people donate screens to this fine country of yours. No need to thank me, welcome to the 21st century. Cheers!

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